Day 2: A Little Off the Top

Day 2-4 Mission: IN PROGRESS…ugh…

Mission: Continue incremental destruction of binky by cutting tip of binky off. Do not deny binky.

Objective: Further reduce comforting sensation of binky to invoke disinterest.

Tantrum Threat Level: MODERATE. It is impossible for Lilly not to notice that the binky has been altered. Thus there is increased likelihood that no one will sleep and everyone will get cranky. [Updated: What was I thinking? Moderate? HIGH! Really freaking HIGH!]

Progress: Umm, maybe? Lilly didn’t even ask for a binky until approximately 12:15 p.m. and actually went down for her nap without it. That’s definitely progress but I think an exhausting birthday party in the morning and a long ride home is more responsible than any binky alterations.

Then there was the first binky encounter when she woke up mid-nap. Lilly struggled to find the words and gestures in her exhausted toddler mind to express that there is clearly something wrong with this binky. After repeatedly pointing to her tongue, she managed to mutter and then repeatedly scream, “Mommy fix it!” and, pointing to the gaping hole in the binky, “Mommy close it!”  Ultimately 2 binkys went flying across the room: rejected. As was the remainder of the nap.

Bedtime was more of the same. It started on schedule at 7:30. It’s 9:15 now and she is still screaming, unhappy with her binky options. We’re getting to the the stage of crying where she’s nearly hyperventilating and I have little hope of sleeping tonight.

Analysis: To be honest, when I first gave Lilly what has come to be known in our house as The One True Binky, and watched her reaction, I had to hold a stuffed animal in front of my face to keep her from seeing me laughing. But within minutes, watching her puzzlement turn to frustration and then just sadness, I almost broke down in tears myself. By bedtime, it was pure dread on my part. It was like knowing that her first true love was about to break up with her and I’d have to get her through the heartbreak. To make matters worse, she appears to be developing a cold with some sinus congestion. It feels cruel to do this to her now, but we’re in too deep. We can’t turn back.

I am in blood
Stepp’d in so far that, should I wade no more,
Returning were as tedious as go o’er.

–Macbeth

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Next Up: Notes From the Trenches (Day 3)

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