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T Minus 23

2011 October 1

Here we are: the month of T. Rex’s birth.

Not surprisingly, I am a total mix of emotions this month. I’m so excited to meet our baby boy, but sad to think that I won’t be able to devote my full attention to Lilly anymore. I’m so done with the discomfort, headaches, exhaustion and startlingly painful “kicks” that come with pregnancy (and don’t get me started on maternity clothes!), but I’m also trying to cherish what is most likely the last time I will experience pregnancy and the miracle of literally growing a human being inside me. I relish having a good excuse to spend hours shopping for baby clothes and nursery decor, but I’m also becoming a total wreck trying to tick through my to-do list before this baby comes.

And then there’s the hormones. One minute I’m crying with joy over the images in a Pampers commercial, the next minute I’m crying at how grown-up my little girl is getting, and then the next I’m crying over how it is nearly impossible for me to be ready in time for T. Rex. (Notice a common theme?)

But ready or not, my c-section has been scheduled — that’s a whole other can of mixed emotions that I won’t open right now — and T. Rex will be here in 23 days, if not sooner.

Wow. Allow me to recover from the massive wave of nerves, excitement, guilt and disbelief that washes over me every time that thought runs through my mind.

Anyway, my mixed emotions are not only the product of my physical state and lack of preparation, but also from the need to re-prioritize just about my whole life, including MushBrain. As much as I’d like to document our final days as a family of three and all of our emotions, excitement and activity leading up to our family of four, I’m not gonna lie. Writing has not been my priority lately. At least not my usual lengthy, get-to-the-point-already, method of writing. True, I struggle to find the time, but the bigger problem is a serious lack of brain capacity. But I love this blog. And I love you, dear reader. So, I will not abandon either. Instead, in an effort to keep things fresh — even if my mind isn’t — I’ll pop on here for regular, but brief, updates on my final days as a human incubator in whatever form I can muster: photos, single sentences, haiku, whatever. And, if my brain cells cooperate and the stars align, I’ll squeeze a few more of my usual marathon posts in too.

So, in that vein, here’s a quick photo synopsis of how Lilly helped me prepare for baby with lots of laughs during my eighth month of pregnancy:

Helping Mommy sort through old baby clothes to find boy-appropriate hand-me-downs.

Adding hamburgers to her diet, so that Mommy (an animal lover/wannabe vegetarian) doesn't feel so guilty about having nearly constant meat cravings.

Earning her credentials as a "Super Sibling."

Spending quality time with Mommy and Daddy, including this very fun afternoon at Disney on Ice.


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